Archive for the ‘Mommy says…’ Category
Storybook Playhouse Project at Bridgeport
Jul
Went and checked out this Fundraiser for Doernbecher at Bridgeport where they are displaying awesome playhouses which you can buy raffle tickets to win. I thought it would be more of an event, but some of the houses were pretty neat. These two were my favorite:
A Wake-Up Call
Jun
I Can’t Be (or blog) Everywhere at Once
Apr
I know, the Kahlan updates have gotten sparse. I’m knee deep in baby and projects so here is a fresh batch of photos to tide you over. A more verbose post to come:
Time Suck Management – Babies are Busy Creatures
Mar
When we discussed my foregoing the traditional 9-5 in favor of becoming a work at home mom to be with our daughter, honestly, I thought there would be a bit more “work” in that equation. I had the realistic expectation that this first year would be more about baby, not counting on any income I would be able to generate, and that as she “got easier” with age I’d be able to put more energy into my work. So far, all my secret expectations to be super productive and instantly grow this amazing business overnight, have been squashed under the very real truth that babies are major time sucks. At this point I’m lucky to get bathroom breaks.
It’s astounding how the minutes turn into hours and our day melts away under a barrage of household tasks, errands and baby needs. I wake up with a list of work goals (without which I’d be even less productive) and by the time Daddy comes home and we start dinner I too often find that list to be mostly untouched.
Time management has always been my strength and now, as a SAHM I’ve never needed those skills more. Here are my top tips to help fellow moms be productive, be with baby and stay sane while staying home.
1. Set Realistic Goals – REALLY
I set goals for myself that are very reasonable. Year one is primarily for baby care and enrichment. I want to build my Internet presence, grow my stock of wares, get into a few retail stores and throw my first in home jewelry show. I unfortunately also have a huge insane list of secret goals like “instantly make as much doing freelance as I did at my day job.” The key to goal setting is to stay motivated and to do that you need to stay realistic. Have a few pipe dream goals, but be sure to stay objective and not fall into the trap of getting down on yourself if they aren’t materializing. Be honest about how much time you will be able to devote to your goals and what is possible to accomplish in that time frame. Avoid getting hung up on the unrealistic. Put even simple tasks on your list so you can feel accomplished as the little check marks add up. Remember, any progress is still progress!
2. To Do List – 1. Make List
The “To Do” list is a simple and vital part of my day. Instead of trying to keep a ton of “need to get dones” in my head and remembering them only after I could have done them I immediately add anything I think of to do to my lists. I use a very simple iPhone app called DoBot ToDos which has the ability to have multiple lists saved and to also assign priorities. This way I have work, personal, baby and miscellaneous lists separate so I can tackle what fits in my day. I also use sub-lists for my various creative outlets, graphics, glass and writing, to track ideas and then as I write an article or finish a project I can check them off and never lose a great creative spark even if I can’t get to it right away. This is a great way to always have something queued up for the times I can’t bring my creative juices up to full speed.
3. Prioritize Priorities
It’s too easy to burn up your spare minutes filling them with bonus tasks you see need doing and “will only take a minute.” I like to keep my to-dos sorted by importance so when a nap or other baby-free moment presents itself I don’t waste those precious times on things that I can do packing her around. When sorting priorities I use a three step rating system: When does it NEED to be done, How many arms do I need, How much time will it take? I tackle the “must be done today” items first depending on how many arms I have free. By this I mean, if a task requires both arms it’s higher priority because it requires baby nap or playtime, which is limited, to accomplish. Any “one arm” tasks can wait until the baby is back to “pick me up” phase. If a task will take a significant amount of time I start it first thing so I can have extra day left to come back to it after interuptions.
4. Formulate a Battle Strategy
Ok, more of a “if this, then that” plan. While I’m tied down nursing or doing any baby activities that don’t require my full attention I start working out my “next move” so to speak so that once we are ready to move to the next activity I waste no time on wondering what I should do. This is also where having multiple lists comes in handy because I can tackle the list best suited to her mood. If she wakes up happy, I can jump on the “two arms” list while she contentedly plays on the floor, but if not I have my back up list of “one arm” tasks in arms reach.
5. Make Time to NOT Manage
All these tips help me get things done, whithout which I’d lose my mind, but it’s equaly important to have time to NOT get things done. To just be with baby and not worry about your lists or the time left in the day. If your like me, this is just as hard to accomplish as the rest of your busy day. If so, add it to your list or schedule an “Event Horizon” a time of day when once reached there’s no going back, your done with the busy work. Kick back and play with baby, relishing in every check mark you did make, and let tomorrow be a new step forward.
Tags: babie, plans, time management
Twilight Saga: New Moon Wolf Kibble Recipe
Mar
New Moon Wolf Kibble - A snack worthy of the Pack!
When the DVD of Twilight released I threw a screening party for my fellow fans and friends who hadn’t made it to the theater or wanted another taste. With the release of the sequel, Twilight Saga: New Moon, I wanted to keep the tradition alive but had a difficult time finding ideas for party food.
There are plenty of Twilight and Vampire snacks out there like these great “bitten” cupcakes my pal Jaimie brought. They are easy to make too! You just bake up some white or yellow cake cupcakes, cut out a cone shape and spoon in cherry pie filling, then top and decorate with a toothpick and left over filling.
However, I wanted a Team Jacob snack since New Moon is really more about introducing the wolf pack than vampire lore. I Googled and found a disappointing array of generic ideas like serving TrailMix or paw-print cakes. One idea was not bad, making cookies in the shape of dog biscuits. I didn’t have a dog-bone cookie cutter handy so I decided to whip up a batch of Dog Food instead. I dubbed the treat Wolf Kibble and served it in inexpensive plastic dog food dishes much to the surprise and laughs of my guests. Here’s the recipe:
New Moon Wolf Kibble
1 12oz Box Golden Grahams Cereal
2c Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips
1c Creamy Peanutt Butter
1 Stick Butter or Margarine
2-4c Powdered Sugar
Large Ziplock Bag
In a microwave safe bowl melt the chips, PB, and butter. I nuked it for 2 minutes on high and that seemed about right. In another large bowl pour in the cereal then pour chocolate mixture over it and stir until evenly covered. Pour into large Zilpock bag, add the powdered sugar and shake vigerously until the cereal mixture is evenly coated and resembles dog food. I recomend doing half the batch at a time so there is plenty of room in the bag to get your shake on. Chill for at least an hour then serve in dog food dishes.
And just for a fun beverage I made these American Red Cross blood donation sleeves to disguise my juice offerings. I suggest Ocean Spray Cranberry, Cran-Apple and Cran-Cherry for blood effect without food coloring or HFCS. You’ll notice the Donation Station number is another tongue-in-cheek Twilight reference. Here is a copy of the graphic if you’d like to use it for your own party:
Chick with a Stick – Learning Crochet
Mar
I recently learned to crochet with less than $5 to start, a few YouTube videos and a great book from the library. I decided that I needed something productive to do while nursing, mainly because I was feeling too attached to my iPhone but also because I had an itch to make something. I hadn’t been getting much studio time so my creative juice ducts were starting to plug, rather than develop an bad case of artist mastitis I picked up a crochet hook.
Inspired by a buddy of mine, thank you knit goddess Marilyn, who knit a beautiful sweater for Kahlan, I chose to delve into the wonderful word of yarn. Since my goal was to craft while breastfeeding I chose crochet for the blunt hook and less pieces. I figure there’s less chance of damaging the munchkin this way. I was also drawn to the organic nature of the work, and admittedly I was entranced with Amigurumi, the Japanese art of crocheting little critters. Too cute!
I started with a $3 pack of cheapo plastic crochet hooks and $2 of clearance #4 sport weight yarn. Using the recommended G size hook I started working a test square of Single Crochet to learn the ropes. About five rows in I got itchy. This is easy, do I really need an entire square? Nope. Hence the love of crochet being organic, I jumped right into Half Double Crochet on the next row. So on and so forth I worked my way through all of the major stitches:
Chain, Slip Stitch, Single Crochet, Half Double Crochet, Double Crochet and finally Treble Crochet. This is what I ended up with at the end of two weeks of dabbling:
How did I learn? I’m a self starter by nature so I googled crochet and found a ton of great resources. Lion Brand Yarn has an excellent reference library as well as a series of YouTube tutorials that I found the simplest and straight forward for each stitch. I fell in love with The Chicks with Sticks Guide to Crochet, and miss it terribly now that it’s back at the library. That book was my primary resource and helped me cement my foundation stitches while loading me up with hip modern pattern inspiration. That being said, my first non-practice square creation ended up being this little blue tree spirit from the Hiyou Miyazaki film My Neighbor Totoro. He began as a practice piece for crochet in the round initially intended to be a ball for the cat. I kept going though and he started lengthening and forming until I recognized him. A bit of cross stitching detail finished him up and he now has new purpose as a baby toy!
For my next project, I’m going to crochet a belt out of hemp since those 30 missing pounds are making it really hard to keep my pants up…
Handmade Gifts – Can’t Buy Me Love
Mar
While anyone can buy a gift, and there are certainly plenty of things a new baby needs, there is a specialness to handmade items that just can’t be purchased. When someone chooses a gift it can be with little thought, but to make something takes a dedication of time that is priceless. Though we are grateful for everything we were given, these handmade pieces have a special place reserved in our baby memory box. They may even be passed on one day to our grandchildren and become heirlooom pieces for the next generation:
1. Crochet Cupcake hat from Uncle Alex.
2. Crochet baby gown made for Grama Diana by her Grama and now passed down five generations.
3. Knit button up sweater with matching booties from my buddy Marilyn.
4. Patchwork Baby Quilt from Matt at Bullseye and family.
5. Wood and Fabric wall art for the nursery from Uncle Alex and Katherine.
Tags: baby gifts, handmade
Choosing Baby (Pt 2) – From D.I.N.K. (Double Income No Kids) to S.I.N.K (Single Income New Kid)
Jan
My husband and I had lived the D.I.N.K. life for eleven years when we became pregnant. We ate out most days, sometimes for two meals. Bought whatever gadgets we wanted, books and movies galore. We planned a yearly vacation and had weekend retreats in between. Life was good and we were pretty happy. None of that compared to welcoming our daughter to the world.
All the material cluttering our lives melted away and seemed so much less important. It was nice, don’t get me wrong. I like my movie collection. I like that we have walls of books covering our house. I really like our house. I LOVE my baby girl. More than I thought I was capable of loving. So, as my leave approached its end, our conversations began to drift from all the things we would do with our daughter, and started being framed as all the things we would miss while she was in daycare.
That’s when it started getting really bad for me. I’ll be honest, I was dying inside already. Waking in the night crying and not knowing why. I felt this aching sense of lose and I couldn’t pinpoint its cause because during the day I was so genuinely happy and fulfilled.
We had found a great daycare and we had a smooth transition plan in place. I would return on a short week while Daddy stayed home with baby so I could get back in the groove without fretting daycare right away. Daddy would work four tens and have Fridays off and I would use vacation to be home Mondays for five weeks. I thought it would work out. I hoped I would survive it, after all, lots of other moms do it. Right?
After the first week we knew what our hearts had been telling us. It doesn’t matter what other people do. It matters what we do, in the here and now. Because in only a week she was already acting different. Coming home tired and cranky. Sullen and reserved when put down, like she didn’t expect us to come back for her. That was enough. I might have survived the gruelling schedule, we may have been able to make it work. But at what cost? How much of our sweet social baby would be chipped away as the hours in daycare grew longer once I ran out of vacationed Mondays? If one week could instill noticeable changes, would one month be worse, or one year?
In the end it came down to one simple truth. When your lying on your deathbed the things you’ve owned mean nothing, the only things that do, are your memories and the loving relationships of your life. The things you DID. I can always go back to work if this new life doesn’t fly, but I can never get back my baby’s childhood or the time we would lose together while working outside the home earning not a whole lot after daycare costs.
So for her, because I love her more than I can articulate, I will embrace this new life. At full speed with as much optimism and bravery I can muster. This is for you my love. My time. My attention. My every breath.
Choosing Baby – Why & How I Decided to Leave My Job (Pt. 1)
Jan
After tomorrow I will be officially unemployed. I didn’t get laid off, my company is actually still there, and no one has burned down the building. I chose unemployment. I chose to be home to raise my daughter the way my husband and I have decided she deserves to be raised. I chose the people I love over the things that I covet. It was a long, difficult and stressful decision. Here is the windy version for those still shocked and perplexed by my seemingly sudden change of heart.
In an economic slump, when so many people are desperately seeking employment, it sounds almost insane that I would be choosing to leave my career and hard won position of eight years. I worked so hard, fought so long, to slowly earn my degree while working to pay for it. I never wanted kids growing up. I wanted a successful career, to be the best I could be at something, and generally rock the chick power. Once I reached a point in my life where my husband and I decided our tune had changed and we wanted kids, I never stopped for a second to think my career would be effected. Sure, I’d probably have to adjust my schedule, stop working 15 hour days and learn to leave work at work. Plenty of other career women do it. Just fine. No sweat.
I was ridiculously naive.
My excuse? I’m an only child, whose childhood was rough at best, I never understood babies or cared to be around them. Honestly, they freak me out man. To little and breakable. To smelly and loud. It took me thirty years to have one because I was so afraid I would mess up an innocent little person with my seeming lack of maternal instinct. Everyone says it’s different when it’s your own babe… I didn’t believe it back then, but everyone was right.
The moment my little girl came into the world wide awake and drug free, warm in my arms, I had an epiphany. This was my success. THIS was what I was meant to be. A mother. Her mother. I felt like Neo being jacked in for the first time, a million gigs of data streaming into a blank reality. Once you choose the red pill you can’t go back, your no longer the person you were then, your changed in the most fundamental and irrevocable way.
In that moment I became everything I always feared I never could be. I was flooded with love, joy, and the biggest natural high of my existence (truly natural birth is FANTASTIC). I wanted to give her everything, but not just stuff. I wanted her to feel the joy she’d given me in her life, to reach for her dreams, to know how much she was loved and wanted. We spent my maternity leave dreaming together. Her; of things I can only wonder at, me; of the things I wanted to teach her and the experiences I hope she will have. Birth was magnificent, my infant a joy, and then the reality came cascading over me. I was weeks away from returning to work and faced leaving the center of my universe behind… with strangers.
Come back tomorrow for Part 2 – How we made the change from D.I.N.K. (Double Income No Kids) to S.I.N.K (Single Income New Kid)
